What would Christopher Reeve do?
Friday, July 10, 2009 at 08:17PM I admit it. I've been feeling very, very sorry for myself these past few days. I worked on Monday and Tuesday at an ad agency and ended up spending Wednesday in bed, then felt a little off all day Thursday, then woke with a very weird headache today (not quite a migraine, but worse than a standard headache and on the right side of my head instead the left, where my most talented headaches usually make an appearance). And as I lie here wishing I had never injured my brain, wishing to feel free of dizziness for just one day or even a few hours, wishing I were not a burden to anyone, especially Catherine, I have to ask myself: What would Christopher Reeve do?
When I think back on how he kept on with his life with cheer and energy, despite being completely paralyzed from a fall, I am staggered and humbled. I have not witnessed a more courageous and inspiring story in my life. Nothing else even comes close, really. What was his secret? To try to figure it out -- although, most likely his secret is not a secret at all, he was simply a very, very rare human being -- I'm going to buy his book Nothing Is Impossible.
Say tuned.
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Reader Comments (9)
Jeff, I've known you for many years. We've worked together. We've played together. We've wrestled with the ad biz together. And we've now written songs together.
As much as I sympathize with your pain and suffering, and truly wish they would simply leave you alone, you should hang on to something that you have expressed yourself...
despite the pain and trouble and longing for normality...it may be that you are a better human being since the accident.
I truly hope that the problems will leave you given time. But I also hope you stay the way you are in terms of personality and point of view.
We all have prices to pay to become our true selves. I wish that yours were less painful. But how you have dealt with your problems and the changes they have created in you are definitely positive.
Please hang on to this.
Christopher Reeves was indeed a special person. Because he played the hand that fate dealt him. And so can you.
You're a great guy who has made incredible progress since all this happened to you.
You've gone full bore on your music and you're close to finishing an album. You've run a major agency in SF and transitioned into a whole new phase of that career path.
Most importantly, you've gotten married to an amazing woman.
Plus, you've got a lunch date with me next week.
Okay, maybe that's not as good as I think it is.
I've known you ever since you popped out; the doc held you up be your feet; you started hollering at the top of your lungs and pissed all over the doctor. He laughed and, as I remember,said "it's a healthy baby boy!". You have been very clear about how you feel about things ever since. You are a careful, thorough, independent thinker who I have, after decades of interaction, reach a very rewarding point a few years ago where l learn as much from you as you learn from me.
You are dealing with a tough, challenging situation that is only very slowly bending to your effort and will; but it is bending. Almost every time I see you you are a little better; sometimes you notice too.
When you push to your crash point as you have this week you find it very frustrating and you fiercely want it to be different. I can't know the future better than anybody else but I suspect when you push yourself past your limit, in addition to your suffering, sometimes there is a therapeutic effect. It contributes to your very slow but very consistent bias towards improvement. I see your improvement and wish it to happen without the downers but I'm still thankful that it is happening. And take Dave Tutin's very fitting, insightful words to heart.
You are Catherine's world, not her burden, & she chose you over everybody else. Life is frustrating--2 steps forward, 1 step back---but when I think of our visit 2 months after your accident & compare it with the joy of your wedding last fall, there is such a stark contrast that it is really miraculous. I agree with your dad--read & reread Dave's response & Malachy's, too. And get to Micky D's for a lunch that will make you smile :-)
I'm not sure I can write anything better than what has already been written. I think setbacks like days of migraines for you and days of fatigue/pain for me erase perspective, so it's important to try to do what we can to hang onto it even in the midst of these setbacks. you really have come so far-not far enough, maybe, but it is something, and even your setbacks don't erase the progress, just the perspective. let me know how the book is...and go reread all these comments the next time it all feels impossible.
xo,
sara
Pain sucks, but it also makes feeling good feel really good.
Remember, "Bloom where you are planted"
I hope Christopher Reeve's book inspires you- take it one day at a time!
X0X0 Carreen
PS- I loved your post on my blog! Thank you!!!!!!!
Thanks everyone for the kind and encouraging words. Today -- this week, in fact -- has been awful, but reading these comments is the best medicine I could have hoped for.
With luck, tomorrow, I'll be back to "normal".
Hey Jeff,
Sorry you're feeling down these days. Christopher Reeve inspired many people with his courage and positive attitude. Based on the comments here, you clearly have had a positive affect on many peoples lives, and they stand ready to lift you up in any way they can, as you have done for them when they needed support. Hang in there, and know that your in my thoughts and prayers.
Jeff- I just read this after reading your Michael Jackson post.
I hope you are feeling better and more hopeful today. I am so sorry for your pain; and you are NOT a burden to Catherine- she loves you and choose you, like her Mother said!!
You have come really far in how you have improved. When I first saw you in SF after the accident and we all walked through GG Park, Cat and Jeff had to help you walk b/c you were so wobbly as we walked in the Japanese Tea Garden. You had to sit on your couch that day with your head resting the entire time on the back of the couch. Do you remember this time?
Now, I just saw you here for your visit. You were not wobbly and you sat outside at Eric and Carreen's all night without resting your head on the back of their lawn chairs-not even once! Unless you did when I wasn't looking;D
And at our house, I had you down on the floor trying to do a few Pilates moves...you could not have done this on that first trip when I was in SF with Jeff.
You have improved:) And with your fighting spirit, you will continue.
We are all here for you, near and far, cheering you on every step of this journey.
Hugs from us!
jamee, jeff, dylan and logan